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Archive for February, 2009

I hate it when people try a certain type of approach to diet, then decide that since it worked for them it must ultimately work for others and then they get all dogmatic about it. Who’s to say one style of eating is right for everyone?

There are so many approaches out there: South Beach, the Schwarzbein Principles, the Paleolithic diet, Atkins, the Zone, and the list goes on and one. But here’s my take on it: Why not just eat HUMAN FOOD? Why sink your money into books and other implements of a prescribed program (which they claim you have to buy in order to get the benefits) when you could just eat good, plain, whole foods?

To me, this means eating good, unadulterated fats (non-hydrogenated) from mostly plant sources, complex carbs, no added sugar, lean protein, and lots of veggies and fruits. Avoid high fructose corn syrup, avoid white-flour based carbs, and reserve sweets for special occasions. Get your fats mainly from things like olive oil, avocados, flax seeds, unrefined extra virgin coconut oil (refined coconut oil is hydrogenated – don’t eat it!), hemp seeds (so rich in omegas), fatty fish like salmon, nuts, etc.

I stopped eating soy and my hypothyroidism disappeared, by the way. Anecdotal evidence FTW! I don’t think soy is all that great for us.

Lately I have been indulging in too many refined carbs, and I can definitely feel it. For one, you lose the fiber and the nutrition. Two, it sends your body into sugar-crash mode. I always feel more fatigued and less “peppy” when I eat these things. But at the same time, I know for the rest of my life I’ll encounter them. It’s going to be my willpower’s strength that will determine how much I indulge. I’m attending a birthday party tonight with desserts involved. I made homemade, from-scratch chocolate chip cookies to take. I plan on eating a good dinner beforehand so I don’t arrive hungry, but I’ve decided to take one bite of the main desserts. Luckily the girls will also be providing fruit salad.

After tonight, I plan on cutting down my sugar intake drastically. I always allow myself a weekly “sweet treat” usually on the weekend, but lately I’m finding that I go a little too overboard with that, so I’m going to modify my allowance and make that “sweet treat” some unsweetened, dried fruit. I love dried fruit, especially mangoes! And we sell them at work, so I can buy a few of the dried mango slices in bulk, and have that be my treat instead. I’m also going to be mindful of avoiding things with high fructose corn syrup. It sucks because HFCS is added to so many things, even things like bread! Luckily I know how to bake my own 🙂 Also I find the less wheat I eat the better I feel anyway. When I’m eating mostly cooked whole grains like rice or quinoa, I feel like those carbs “work” for me better than wheat (I think the gluten is the problem).

People might laugh at me for this, but one thing that’s worked for me in the past with avoiding too many sweets is pretending that the cookies or whatnot have been poisoned and if I eat them, it’ll lead to my demise. This is a partial truth, of course, because you pay for eating too many sugary things with your health.

I don’t want to be super dogmatic, but at the same time I think sugar is the biggest problem for me. It’s a trigger, too. If I eat too much sugar it sends me into binge eating mode. It’s crazy. I’ve got to pretty much all but give it up I feel.

A dessert buffet to someone like me is like handing an alcoholic a whole fifth of Jack Daniels and saying, “here, just have one shot of this, and save the rest for later!” Ugh.

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Oh my freaking gord, I hate it when people notice how much weight I’ve lost and then decide that they should warn me against becoming an anorexic! This pisses me off because to me I take it as people assuming that I’m losing weight for vanity alone, and that I must be a candidate for a mental disorder and that I must have such low self esteem that I could become anorexic from embracing a healthier lifestyle. It also proves that the Fat Acceptance rhetoric has somewhat permeated our culture and that people now view losing excess weight to get healthy as a gateway to anorexia. I usually kind of let this stuff roll off my back when I hear it, but it still pisses me off. It assumes that there are only two extremes and that no one is able to find a middle ground. When I think critically about this, I realize that it’s not the person assuming that I’m so weak that I’d default to anorexia as a result of losing excess fat. What it really is to me is a societal brainwashing. The fact that people are so blindly ignorant of what signifies health and a good body image is proof that Fat Acceptance may be a small movement, but that Americans have adopted much of the misconceptions that the FA movement tries to convince us is true. All that being said, I don’t see myself ever being anorexic. I’m the kind of person who almost always has a healthy appetite, even when I’m sick. The only exceptions to this are when I’m really worried about something or anxious, or if I’m experiencing a stomach-related illness in which vomiting is involved. Otherwise, I’m usually all for eating. I also consider the eating habits that I had before I began this journey to be way more disordered than they are now. That being said, I still have to really watch myself and stay on top of my habits to prevent binges, and I’ll probably be this way for the rest of my life. I’d rather have a handle on it and be healthy than “accept” it as “part of who I am” and be so fat that I have joint and muscle problems and become a candidate for other illnesses down the road. I also feel like being really big messed with my hormones. As a thinner person than I was, my emotions are more stable, I’m able to control my moods better, and I feel more at peace with myself. I’m still a stress-ball and still struggle with panic from time to time. High blood pressure and other heart-related ailments run in my family so I have to work on that mental aspect of myself to stay healthy. But hey, I’m way better than I was 2 years ago.

Also, I hate how someone who is thin but healthy (a good muscle-to-fat ratio, proportionate body size, not starving, just lean) is now considered “too skinny.” Bleh.

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I had 3 different regular customers at work comment on my weight loss yesterday. I think because it has been so slow and gradual over the last 2-odd years that several people who see me frequently are just now starting to really notice a dramatic difference. They always ask me how I did it, as if there’s some magical formula that’s any different than anything they’ve heard before. I am very candid with people about how often I’ve fallen off the wagon and that I just don’t have the metabolism to “eat what I want” and not gain weight, so I have to practice a lot of willpower and self control, which I don’t always have. I also emphasize the importance of being active, much to many people’s chagrin. This is somewhat surprising because I work in a health food store, and most of the people who come in seem relatively healthy, which is why they like to shop where I work. But I still get asked that odd, “so how have you done it?” question. It’s mildly annoying because I’m tired of repeating myself, but I guess it’s just part of our society. People still try and ask to see if maybe I’m the exception to the rules of “eat less/better, move more.” Well, I’m not. But it’s still a nice ego massage when people notice, even if they do ask retarded questions about it..hehe.

For awhile there I was beating myself up over not losing weight fast enough. It’s taken me 2 years to lose 50 lbs. But then I think about my exceptionally short height and how 50 lbs. on me is like 100 lbs. on a taller person. I have fallen off the wagon a lot. There’s a lot of mental weirdness surrounding food for me. I have my “out of control” mode vs. my “in control” mode. I still sometimes binge eat. It’s way less than it used to be, and I’m more capable of catching myself in the act and stopping it before it goes too crazy these days. Any time I do overeat, I feel pretty sick and have digestive side effects that are hard to live with, which is a good deterrent. Keeping my food journal is a great help. Anyway, I’m not perfect. I haven’t lost weight quickly. But I’ve lost it, and I plan on losing more, no matter how long it takes. That being said, I tend to lose a lot of weight when the weather is temperate, which is due to happen in the very near future. I don’t get sick in the spring and summer months, so this year I plan on really utilizing the warm weather to my advantage.

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I have stretch marks and saggy skin from all the weight I’ve lost. I’m young enough that I know that’ll eventually go away with time. I have a pretty good skin-care regimen, I use a good cocoa butter lotion and such. But it’s annoying, and it’s a reminder of the damage I did to my body by being so fat for a good decade or so. At least now when I’m walking I can look down and see my feet. Most people in my life consider me a “normal” weight at this point. I have about 30 lbs. left to lose until I’m at my goal of 120. It feels good being in the “home stretch” for sure, but I just really hope that my skin starts to look normal eventually. I accept that I may always have a little bit of stretch markage going on, but I hope they at least become reduced in appearance.

My ankles are weak for some reason. Wearing ankle braces while I work out isn’t really helping, it almost seems to make it worse. I still work out and work on my feet anyway. I have to. I deal with the pain with Tiger Balm, ibuprofen, and soaking my feet and ankles in epsom salt. I keep telling myself that this too shall pass. I can’t afford new shoes right now. Good shoes are expensive, even if you get them on sale.

My mom got me a cute, new workout outfit to wear to the gym. My current workout clothes are more appropriate for winter time and what my mom got me will be good for when the weather is warmer. We’ve been having really nice, sunny, warm days this week so I’ve been skipping the gym in favor of getting outdoor exercise. I just can’t stand being shut-in inside all day. I’m on day 2 of a 7-day work week. This shall be interesting. I know that exercise will help me not get too stressed at work. The next Saturday that I get off work, I want to go swimming. The bathing suit I bought at the end of the summer last year that was a bit too snug now fits great. It’s not a “sexy” bathing suit, it’s just a nice suit that a swimmer would wear, very full-coverage and aerodynamic (or would that be hydrodynamic?)…Even when I get to be thin I’m not sure I’m into the idea of prancing around in a bikini.

I would rather have saggy skin than extra fat. I know for a fact my skin isn’t as saggy as some people’s who’ve lost a lot of weight since I’ve lost weight slowly, and because I didn’t get as fat as some people.

I’m going to go change into my workout clothes and run now. It’s really pretty outside and unseasonably warm.

As far as being poor goes, we seem to be doing ok. I’ve picked up extra hours this week at work (obviously) and hope to pick up some more later, enough to cover all the bills and such. It’ll be close, but we’ll make it. Roomie’s bosses want to get people back to work in a few weeks if all goes well. Think positive for us, I’m doing my best to do so.

I had a tough weekend with food. I succumbed to my lust for donuts and ate a half dozen of them over 2 days. I guess some would argue that you could do far worse than that, but 3 donuts is a lot of calories and sugar and bad crap. This is why you eat before going grocery shopping. Me and the roommate went to go get a few necessities and neither of us had eaten much that day. That was a mistake because we cruised by the bakery to maybe get a little of the day-old bread for dinner, and instead left with a dozen donuts since they’d marked down the day-old ones to half priced dozens. I told myself I’d only have like 2 of the whole dozen and the roomie could have the rest, but I ended up having six. And I felt it, too. Blarf. I suppose that other people do worse and maybe I shouldn’t beat myself up over it, but because I felt very “out of control” and binge-y while indulging in these things, instead of it being a planned thing, I feel that it merits a little bit of reflection so I deter myself from doing it again. That being said, we rarely keep any sweets in the house aside from his lime sherbet and pop tarts (which I hate anyway, they’re all his and the skinny mofo can eat a ton without gaining an ounce), and sometimes some lowfat frozen yogurt for me to have on weekends (to keep me from eating things like donuts, lol). So I guess I didn’t do as bad as many people do every day. Sometimes I wonder if I do replace food for other forms of pleasure that would actually fulfill me more, like masturbation or massage…haha. Either way, back in control yesterday and today, which is good.

OK I’m going to go exercise now. Laters!

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So as I’ve mentioned before, I’m a product of two people who were very incompatible for a relationship beyond simple dating, but who got pregnant and felt like getting married was the “right thing to do.” My mom and dad had a fun relationship before my mom accidentally got preggers with yours truly. They weren’t serious about starting a family, but once my mom got knocked up, she immediately switched gears and went into responsible parent mode. My dad half-heartedly tried to do that by marrying my mom. Their marriage didn’t last. My mom hated her dress, hated the wedding, hated everything about marrying my dad. She also came to dislike my dad greatly over the 2 years they were married. She divorced his ass because he basically refused to grow up. She had to give up having that young, carefree, early-20’s lifestyle, and he refused to do the same. It was an unbalanced and one-sided relationship. I feel bad for my mom because I experimented with being my dad’s roommate after I graduated high school, and he was a bastard to live with. I was starting college classes at that time, and it’s like no time had passed at all, he was still having that partying lifestyle of going out to the bar with his buddies a few nights a week and coming home late, blaring music late, and keeping me awake so I was all groggy during class. Somehow I put up with living with him for 2 years, though. When I was 20, I moved out, lived with my mom and stepdad again for a summer, then moved into my first apartment with no parental involvement.

My dad would have been fun to hang out with in high school and college if he were my age. But he’s not, he’s my dad. He’s supposed to be responsible. He was around, which is more than I can say for a lot of dads. At least he tried to be semi-involved in me and my sister’s lives (the sister comes from his second marriage, which also dissolved because the woman was tired of his shit). But he still owes both of our moms tons of child support money. My mom just didn’t want the drama of going through a legal battle over it, so she got an affidavit signed saying that since I lived with him for 2 years (by state law here child support has to be paid until the child is 21) she was willing to “call it even.” But my ex-stepmom is a little more bitter about it all, and with good cause. Since my younger sister lives about an hour away from here, my dad wasn’t as involved in her life as he was in mine. Sure, it’s a drive, and it’s gas money, but if he hadn’t spent so much on partying, he’d have had that extra money both to go see her more and to pay child support.

It’s funny how addictions rule our lives and make the lives of others hard to live. Luckily me and sis are both adults now, so we no longer “need” our dad. I do love my dad, but I will confess that I don’t actually “like” him that much. I have the feeling that he was just wanting to rush our childhoods so we’d be old enough to party with him. Confession, I have partied with my dad. It was the only way to really bond with him, it seems. I have wanted a good relationship with him for a long time. I also have a stepdad who I love and admire, who’s been the one to really support me over the years. My mom got lucky with him. He’s cool and loving, but he’s also stable and responsible, all positive elements to form a good, family situation. And they love each other. I don’t think my mom and bio-dad were ever actually in love.

My dad still drinks very frequently (although he claims he’s not an alcoholic because he doesn’t keep booze in the house, just goes out – denial!!) and spends most of his free time with his friends partying. He also brags about me and my sister to his friends, sometimes outright taking the credit for how cool and smart we both turned out. That makes me mad, because we saw him twice a month for most of our lives even though he had many other opportunities to visit with both of us on days separate from our “allotted visitation times.” Both my mom and my sis’s mom were really open to him spending even more time with us during the weekdays after school, etc. He likes to pretend that the courts took time away from him, but it was himself who did so because he couldn’t get loaded around us.

Also, he ran himself into a ton of credit card debt over the years because he felt this compulsion to try and buy our love by having a zillion presents under the tree at Christmas and lavishing us with “cool gifts” on our birthdays and going all-out. Even as a little kid I knew the truth, knew his income wasn’t good enough to be doing this. It made me sad to get these presents in the end because I knew what was really going on. Both my sister and I were aware of the child support situation all through our lives. Dad justified being late on the payments in many ways. He mostly blamed the fact that he’s single (although he spent a good 10+ years in various, and yes failed, relationships) and only makes one person’s income. He blamed the economy. He blamed everything except for personal responsibility. If he’d not run up credit card debt for presents for us, or spent a good hundred bucks per week on partying, he’d have been able to make bills, buy food for himself, and pay our child support. It’s simple priorities. Most people can switch off the selfish when they have kids, but he chose not to.

This isn’t whining or saying, “poor me.” I know other kids have it worse than me. Cause at least I know my dad does love me and my sister. But at this point neither side makes much of an effort to keep in touch or hang out more often than the allotted holidays and birthdays. You could compare it to the chicken and the egg…who stopped making an effort first, the dad or the kids? He likes to blame us, and we like to blame him. I know I could call him more often, but I don’t. Because I really, when I truly think about it, don’t like hanging out with my dad for longer than an hour or two at a time. He’s “cool” and all, but that’s not what I ever wanted from a father. I have cool friends, damnit. I mean, I understand when you’re an adult you forge a friendship with your parents instead of it being so parent-child, but since I never got the latter from him, I resent the friendship thing. Plus, he’s kind of dumb, which I suspect is from years of killing his brain cells. He was never a brilliant genius to begin with, but I remember him being way sharper even just 5 years ago, and more willing to discuss things like politics and current events. He now quickly changes the topic when we go there because he “hates politics” which to me means he fails to keep himself informed of what’s going on in the world. He also has the nerve to call himself an “old hippie.” First, he’s more a product of the 70’s “let’s just fucked up until we fall over” culture, not a “hippie.” To me, a hippie cares about world affairs, is well informed about current events, and wants to change the world for the better. He’s more interested in the self-centeredness of getting wasted, and since he has some more liberal points of view I guess that makes him, in his eyes, a “hippie.”

I love my dad, but I don’t love his actions. I also don’t really like him that much. Also, every time he’s seen me and I’ve lost more weight, he goes on about how pretty I look. I want to be like, “so were you ashamed of how I looked before or something?” I know he’s just trying to compliment me, but it kind of pisses me off because while I personally enjoy the vanity aspect of it, it’s not the most important thing. Furthermore, I’ve accomplished way more than losing weight, but the weight loss thing is all he notices these days. My dad has always been self-righteous about weight even though he himself is consistently overweight. Beer = liquid calories and he won’t give it up. He also overeats. He’s never gotten over 250 lbs, but has a signature beer gut. Furthermore, my much healthier uncle had a heart attack in his 50’s, and he was way healthier than my dad then, so if my dad is pretty unhealthy, what are his odds of suffering the same fate, especially with a big belly? And he continues his bad habits with no regard to how my sister and I will have to deal with it if he gets sick or the unthinkable happens. Selfish. But when I was really overweight the first time around, he always made comments about it, told me what I should do, etc. If he had been the perfect picture of health, I’d have taken his words way more seriously. When he finally stopped hounding me about it is when I finally decided to do it for myself the first time around. I wasn’t a child anymore living at home when I gained all the weight back, though, so he didn’t gripe at me about it then. He doesn’t remember hounding me about it the first time. Ha. I mean, it’s one thing to be concerned about an obese or overweight relative, friend, or spouse. And I think it’s okay to bring it up in a loving manner. I like My Fat Spouse for this reason. BUT, the way he always brought it up was tactless, accusatory, and hypocritical. I know a lot of people who are confronted about their weight even in a loving manner often take it as those things, but I can assure you he really was those things. And like I said, if he were a fit person who took care of his health, I’d have taken him way more seriously. Also, I had to confront my own issues myself. It took me a second time (this time around) to learn all the lessons I need. Sometimes people do have to find their own way in their own time. What I find funny is that the first time I lost a lot of weight I was still living with him. He’d come home and see me exercising and make fun of the exercises I was doing…so I got a very conflicting message from him. Argh!!!! fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck!!!!

This is why I don’t hound the people in my life about their weight. If they ask me what I do, I will tell them. I will live by example. I will share things if I’m asked. But I will never, ever be the way my dad was to me to other people in my life. I feel hurt when a relative chooses their love of food (or alcohol, or anything self-destructive) over their love for their family, but in the end it’s really up to them to change. That’s how I feel with my dad’s drinking and unhealthy lifestyle. If that’s what he wants to do to himself, it’s his business, but I’m not going to necessarily clean up his mess either. I’m not endowed with a lot of money myself, so if he needs special care over the years, he’s probably not going to get the best available. I’ll definitely make sure he’s taken care of as an old person, and I’ll visit him regularly enough to assure that he’s being taken care of. But when he mentions things like me or my sister taking him in as an old man to keep him out of the nursing home, I’m like, “no, I’m never living with your crazy ass again.” And I don’t think I’m a bad kid for this, and neither is my sister. I’ll do my part to make sure he’s in good conditions wherever he stays as an old person, but I will not let his guilt trips play upon my mind. I really don’t owe this man a thing, including grandchildren. He’s always going on about how he wants grandchildren. I cannot guarantee at this point in my life that I plan on even having kids, and neither can my sister. I don’t feel like it’s fair for him to pressure us to procreate in such a fucked up, scary, unstable world. I haven’t found a stable enough life partner to consider doing this, and I also don’t really like kids enough to want any of my own. I like them, but I like to take them back. I feel like I’m better off being honest about this than forcing myself to say I’ll have kids. My sister is a lesbian. While the tides may turn and allow her and a partner to adopt more easily, or conceive through artificial insemination, she’s in her very early 20’s, in college, and has not even thought about that yet as she’s focused on her career goals and putting a life together for herself. I feel like that sort of pressure is very unfair.

All that being said, both my sister and myself have a guilt complex about it and always feel a compulsion to say, “I love him, but…” But here’s the thing, it’s already a given that we love our dad, but we are not obligated to like him, nor are we obligated to support his bad behaviors. We are also not obligated to go out of our way to support him as an elderly person when he seemed to go out of his way to avoid his parental obligations when we were children. I do feel obligated to make sure he doesn’t suffer any abuse in a retirement home situation, the nurses are kind to him, his hygiene and nutritional needs are met, he has decent entertainment options, and I will visit him as frequently as possible. But honestly he seems to want to dig his grave with beer bottles and cigarettes and bad food. He may live a long time despite these habits, and he may not. I really do want him to stay around longer, honestly, because as much as I go on about how much I dislike him, I hold some small amount of hope that he’ll get his head out of his ass one day and listen to me long enough to try and repair our relationship, and that one day I will actually like my dad again.

I did this post on this blog because only one person from my real life reads this, and I like the anonymous sounding board this blog creates. People who know me well hold biases, and people who don’t, do not. Thanks for reading if you got this far. I don’t really want sympathy or anything, I’ll just be happy if people listened so I know I’m not in the wrong for feeling this way.

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My poor roommate – he’s been laid off for a month! The blessing is he’s only laid off til March. He works for a small business and things have been really bad for them, so they can only afford to pay one employee right now. They promised that people could come back in March to work, however. It made him really sad, and worried. The local ads in our paper offer almost no job listings right now. There are a very few openings for people in professional environments which he doesn’t have the college degree to get. Without his income, we can’t afford to make all our bills, rent, and this doesn’t even count food or other expenses. He’s going to try his best to find something though, even if it’s just washing dishes or something at a restaurant, to make some income unless this blows over. What’s crazy is that the local strip joints aren’t even hiring right now. You know times are tough when the tittie bars aren’t even hiring!

We both had our various meltdowns about it yesterday, and today is all about moving forward and trying to be solution-oriented. I have no lease at my apartment and honestly I don’t want to because my landlord is a total slum lord and this place has a lot of problems. I don’t want to be stuck here in case something cheaper, better, or both may come along. You have to have a lease w/ your landlord to qualify for food stamps. Getting food isn’t really the problem, though. I already eat on very little money because I eat a lot of healthful staples and I barely ever go out to eat. I keep a good store of spices so I can always make even really simple food taste good. I’m more worried about the utility bills and making rent. With our landlord being a total slum lord, he doesn’t often hassle us if we pay our rent late. It’s just that it’s winter time and the utilities run higher this time of year. Bleh.

I’m trying to be optimistic. I think it’s a major blow to his self-esteem though. Most people don’t like being unemployed. And he can’t collect unemployment because his boss can’t afford it, so he’d rather forego it for now and allow the business to recover so he can eventually get back to working there. So he has to find a temporary job and those aren’t plentiful. This guy is like a brother to me, I respect and love him dearly. He is my best friend, too. I feel awful for him because he’s put a lot of love and energy into this job. 😦

I can at least pick up a few hours at work. Right now I only work about 32 hours a week or so, so I can fit in an extra 8 hours a week if I can get coworkers to leave early on some days and let me come in a couple hours early. They don’t let us do overtime, but adding an extra 8 hours will make it all possible. My boss is really cool and said he’ll try to work on something for me. I like my job enough that taking on extra hours doesn’t make me stressed. I will sign up for sub shifts on the weekends as they come up as well. This may cut down time I can spend at the gym, which bums me out, but hey, I gotta do what I gotta do.

Sorry to post about my poorness on my weight loss blog. I have never used lack of money as an excuse to eat junk food, and I never will. 🙂 I know that we’ll get through this tough spot. It’s also semi-comforting to know we’re not the only ones right now. 11 million people are unemployed. I’m sticking to my job like glue…

I do have something fun to look forward to this weekend. A dear friend of mine is having a small wedding ceremony on Saturday with dinner to follow after. My roomie and I are 2 of 5 people who will be attending, so I feel very special to have been invited. Also, she said to wear pajamas, which will be really fun. Having something fun and positive to look forward to will boost me and my housemate’s morales tenfold. Also he has a date on Sunday with this girl he’s seeming to really hit it off with, so hopefully that will cheer him up. I’m not a fan of making people who are unemployed through no fault of their own feel bad or guilty about it, and I’m also not a fan of said people going through such things feel like they aren’t allowed to have fun.

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If you’re one of those people who’s unhappy with being fat, yet you don’t want to put any effort into your attempt at losing weight, there are endless products out there that are made just for you! Whether or not any of them works is debatable, but either way I know that a lot of people would rather just try and buy their way thin than do any actual work or use any real will-power to get there.

How much anal leakage are you willing to put up with to lose a pound per month?

An interesting weight-loss drug that seems to be enjoying a lot of popularity right now is the over-the-counter Alli. Alli carries with it a few amusing side effects, including anal leakage!!! The reason is does this is that when you use Alli and consume too many fats, it purges them from your body. Sounds appealing until you go to the john and look down to see a huge spot of grease soiling your undies. I guess the purpose of this is to deter people from eating too much fat, but a certain amount of good fat is essential to your body working well, and thus can actually help you lose weight if you balance it out and don’t eat more fat grams per day than your daily recommended amount (which can be tweaked from person to person because we’re all different). Some even argue that Alli can block the absorption of these healthy fats and cause nutritional deficiency in people who take it! This is just one person’s take on Alli in 2006 (around the time it was approved as safe by the FDA), but it seems pretty spot-on.

The possibility of nutritional deficiencies aside, why the hell would anyone put up with such awful, impractical side effects like diarrhea or anal leakage? WHY? For one, you’re paying to have oil come out yer butt and stain your clothes! And two, you don’t need the medicine to avoid eating too much fat, just do that yourself! But some people will try anything that doesn’t require them doing the actual thing they have to do to achieve something they want. I used to try to save people, to change their minds about this sort of thing, but human beings are damn stubborn. Therefore, my new response is, “well, it’s your money and you can waste it any way you want. Have fun pooping your pants!”

The one respectable thing I can say about the Alli ads that I’ve seen is that they don’t promise results without modifying your diet. That is the one and only redeeming thing about this pill that I can think of. Any weight-loss product that promises results without behavioral modification is guaranteed to be complete quackery, that much I can promise you. Other than the fact that Alli requires you to follow guidelines and stick to them, I think the side effects are too dangerous and too embarrassing (adult diapers anyone?) to make it worth it.

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